Episode 7 - Decision Making - Part 1
This week we’re diving into something my clients ask about all the time: decision making. Because this is such a big topic I’ve spread it out over two episodes.
In this episode, I’ll explain how your smart mind actually makes it extra HARD for you to make decisions.
I’ll show you all the smart ways in which it tries to block you from making decisions - and how to fix that.
And in the next episode I’ll tell you how to make sure whether you made the right decision, and teach how to get better at decision-making.
Resources
Full Episode Transcript
Welcome to the managing your smart mind podcast with your host, Else Kramer, a.k.a. Coach Kramer.
This week we’re diving into something my clients ask about all the time: decision making. Because this is such a big topic I’ve spread it out over two episodes.
In this episode, I’ll explain how your smart mind actually makes it extra HARD for you to make decisions.
I’ll show you all the smart ways in which it tries to block you from making decisions - and how to fix that.
And in the next one I’ll tell you how to make sure whether you made the right decision, and teach how to get better at decision-making.
But first, a little detour, if you’ll allow me.
Think about your smart mind for a moment.
Do you believe everything it tells you?
Every thought it offers?
If so, you’re going to have to stop doing that.
Your smart brain often lies to you.
It will wildly exaggerate risks, underestimate your capabilities, tell you you don’t know enough about whatever it is you want to do, and so on and so forth.
And it has a very good reason to do this: it wants to keep you safe.
It wants to make sure you don’t get cast out of the tribe, that you don’t experience uncomfortable emotions, because those will a. Upset the energy balance and could eventually, b. Lead to your demise.
I will talk more about the mechanics of this in future episodes, but for now, suffice to say, you need to start taking your thoughts with a grain of salt.
Especially when it comes to decision making.
Here’s the first belief about decisions your brain may, consciously or not, be holding, that you want to challenge:
The belief that you can predict the future.
Now you may mutter ‘of course I don’t think I can know the future, but I am pretty good at predicting what will happen - I can create projections based on past experiences which will have a high likelihood of recurring’.
And it seems to make sense, to be smart, to base your decisions on projections into the future.
But not if you use this as an excuse to avoid making actual decisions.
If your thoughts branch out into dozens of decision trees, with lots of different possibilities you now need to all weigh against each other.
You may even spend hours creating Excel sheets will weighted pros and cons.
This is exhausting. But in addition, it also stops you from creating real change in your life.
You do not know the future (recent world events are humbling reminders that none of us do) - so you may want to revisit your belief that making decisions should be based on past experience.
If you keep using the past to make decisions about the future, it will be very unlikely that you will create something completely new in your life.
And isn’t that what your smart mind craves?
So yes, by all means, allow yourself ten minutes or so to do a little risk analysis if you must, but then let it go.
Because who knows what might happen?
(And if you still think you do know, please get in touch so we can buy a bunch of lottery tickets together).
OK, so decision making is hard for your smart mind because:
Your brain thinks it can and should project into the future to protect you from making mistakes,
Thus making you run around in circles until you’re too exhausted to even make a decision.
That’s the first way in which it’s harder.
But there’s more.
Your mind also believes that if you spend more time making a decision, it will end up being a better decision, because you will KNOW MORE, and knowledge is golden, right?
Let’s research some more into that camera you have been wanting to buy for four months.
Let’s check more reviews.
Compare prices.
Ask a couple more photographers.
Oh and look, this new model is being launched soon, I better wait until then.
Optimise, optimise, optimise.
Seems so smart, right?
You’ll end up with the best camera at the lowest possible price.
Maybe.
But even so, what is the actual price you’re paying?
Hours of research.
Hours of weighing pros and cons.
Hours of indecision.
Weeks, if not months, of not having a camera you want to have, using it, enjoying it.
Actually taking pictures.
It’s a massive cost that our smart mind doesn’t see.
Decision-optimisation can be incredibly expensive.
And this is a good time to pause and take an honest look at some decisions you’ve been putting off.
Are you trying to optimize them? If so, what is this costing you?
You may want to give yourself a little deadline here, so you can optimize your life rather than your research.
Last but not least: your brain doesn’t want you to make mistakes, because they tend to cost a lot of glucose.
So it will create a lot of FEAR around decision-making. Again, this usually shows up as lots of lies about the terrible things that will happen to you when you screw up.
Interestingly, it doesn’t scare you with what will happen if you don’t make a decision.
Which makes asking that question, the question how much it will cost you to procrastinate on your decision, the perfect way to counteract all these smart mind shenanigans.
If your brain tells you you’re not ready to make a decision, that something terrible will happen, etc., ask:
What will happen if I don’t make this decision?
What will it cost me to put it off?
To take more time thinking about it, researching it, etc.?
And does it make sense to pay that price, or is it much more effective to just decide, right now?
It’s usually the latter.
Bold decision-making is a super power - it creates confidence, great businesses, and a very interesting life.
If this is something you want to learn, I can help you.
Reach out via my website, coachkramer.org, or send me a message on LinkedIn.
If there is a specific topic you’d love to see covered on this podcast, or someone you’d love to see interviewed, please let me know on: podcast@elsekramer.com.
And if you liked this episode I’d love for you to leave a review so more people can find the podcast and learn to manage their smart mind.